Halloween (2007)

If a classic movie gets remade, the new version should add something worthwhile to the original to justify its existence. Rob Zombie's 2007 version of Halloween provides more details on what made Michael Meyers the monster he is; sadly, this Halloween also adds Zombie's excessive gore, profanity, nudity, and horrible examples of humanity.

As a 10-year-old boy, Michael Meyers (Daeg Faerch) has a horrible home life: mom Deborah (Sheri Moon Zombie) is a stripper, Deborah's boyfriend is an abusive alcoholic cripple, and Michael's older sister is a tramp. Michael does like his baby sister Laurie -- but he's also been killing small animals. Dr. Samuel Loomis (Malcolm McDowell, taking over the part played by Donald Pleasance in the original) warns that Michael is on the path to becoming a psychopath -- proved when Michael kills three people (including two family members) on Halloween night -- and is incarcerated as a result

Seventeen years later, Michael (now played by Tyler Mane, who is amazingly tall yet evades the peripheral vision of every other character in the movie) escapes from prison (thanks to some drunk horny rapist guards) and heads home. Laurie (Scout Taylor-Compton) is a happy, normal teenage girl unaware of her relation to Michael. And before you can say "slasher" there are lots of horny teens getting skewered, Loomis running after Michael, and finally a whole lot of crawling through an abandoned building.

The backstory to what makes Michael Meyers tick (and stab) isn't needed. Nor are the gratituous nudity and violence pervasive through this movie, as well as the plethora of characters that are nothing but scumbags. McDowell is good as Loomis, but the rest of the cast is forgettable. And while Michael's collection of masks is a bit disturbing, the excesses here make this substantially inferior to the original. This Halloween, unless you feel like wallowing in gore and depravity skip the new Halloween and go with the original.

Overall grade: D
Reviewed by James Lynch